Quirkyalone

Age Range of QAs

Feb 07, 2004 - Written by Sasha Cagen  |  Filed under: Uncategorized

What is the age range of your participants? Who comes to a quirkyalone party? A few people have written in asking this question. The answer is: ALL ages, all walks of life. One thing that has amazed me and put quite a smile on my face: At three out of the five readings or events I’ve done to promote the book, MOST of the people in the audience are in their forties, fifties, and sixties. There were several mother-daughter teams at last night’s reading in Lake Forest Park, Washington, proving this is definitely not just a twenty- or thirty-something phenomenon. Last night I asked the audience at Third Place Books how the quirkyalone experience differs for people in middle age; they responded, “It doesn’t! It’s the same!” Lots of laughter all around. Some of the women there shared that they were experiencing a second (or even first) adolescence in their fifites: that they feel like kids again, experiencing a time of independence, freedom, and fun that had been previously unavailable to them during childrearing years. I was pretty inspired by them and by Third Place Books, which is more than a bookstore. Picture an independent-run bookstore the size of Barnes and Noble with a (noncorporate) food court, a photo booth (!) and a space where a local community college holds clases. Tons of bustle all around. Very cool. I wish we had such a store in SF.

Growing Pains

Feb 06, 2004 - Written by Sasha Cagen  |  Filed under: Uncategorized

We’ve significantly expanded the QA online community to make the topical discussions (no relation to topical ointment) more accessible. Have fun exploring, and please let us know what you think in the Feedback forum.

Get Famous Fast

Feb 03, 2004 - Written by Reyhan  |  Filed under: Uncategorized

From a friendly freelancer:

Seeking QAs to interview about s-e-x!

I’m a writer working on an article about quirkyslutting — in other words, how QAs feed those human needs we all have (and can’t seem to ignore). If not in a relationship, what do you do when you get that itch? Reach for your vibrator or lube? Scour the personals? Travel? Call a friend who sometimes doubles as a lover? Pay a visit to an ex you’re still on good terms with? I want to hear your stories!

I’m interested in talking to women, men, QAs from all U.S. time zones, age groups, sexual preferences, and circumstances.

About me: I’ve written for Bust, Bitch, Salon.com, The Seattle Times (for which I interviewed Sasha!), San Francisco Bay Guardian, and the anthology Moment of Truth: Women’s Funniest Romantic Catastrophes.

If interested, please contact me by Feb. 6th at michelleanngoodman@hotmail.com — I’ll write back and arrange a time to call you for a phone interview. Thanks very much.

West Coast Tour

Jan 30, 2004 - Written by Sasha Cagen  |  Filed under: Uncategorized

I’ll be leaving for a short tour to Seattle, Portland, and LA next week and wanted to alert you to these readings and events. There’s a more unorthodox event in Seattle: a passionate discussion of the romantic comedy. Trust that I will be watching a lot of romantic comedies (Sleepless in Seattle???) to prepare. Hope to see you there.

Here is the list of upcoming West Coast events.
LAKE FOREST PARK, WA
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 6
Third Place Books
6:30-7:30 PM
17171 Bothell Way, NE
Lake Forest Town Center

SEATTLE, WA
MONDAY, FEBRUARY 9
Elliot Bay Bookstore
5:00 PM
101 South Mail Street

SEATTLE, WA
ALSO MONDAY FEBRUARY 9
University Bookstore
Film Rap: The Uncompromising Romantic Comedy
(A passionate dissection of Hollywood’s most beloved — yet creatively bereft?–genre, the romantic comedy.)
7:00 PM
4326 University Way, NE

PORTLAND, OR
TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 10
Barnes & Noble
7:30 PM
1720 N. Jantzen Beach

SANTA MONICA, CA
WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 11
Barnes & Noble
7:30 PM
3rd Street Promenade
1201 3rd Street

QA in the UK and Ireland

Jan 30, 2004 - Written by Sasha Cagen  |  Filed under: Uncategorized

If you live in Ireland and identify as QA, please contact Roberta Gray at rgray@tribune.ie. She’s a journalist with the Sunday Tribune and is keen to interview some Irish QAs. All British QAs should also know that a major cover story on the quirkyalone movement will be coming out in the London Guardian’s Observer magazine over the next two weeks. No exact time or place has yet been set for the London IQD gathering on Feb. 14–I think it is time for one of you to make an executive decision and send us the time and place, because after this article comes out, QA consciousness should be quite high. Another bit of UK-specific news–the book will be published on your side of the Atlantic in March; a little birdie told me that the article would include a phone number to order the book.

How can a Social Butterfly be a QA?

Jan 26, 2004 - Written by Reyhan  |  Filed under: Uncategorized

In defining and describing the QA state, one question keeps bobbing up: how can some QAs be incurably social yet still call themselves “alone”? Quirky, sure, but isn’t a stretch to indentify with something you are actually the opposite of? Or, as curious correspondent, directing comments towards Sasha, put it:

So, what does an attractive, successful women with a book, a USA Today feature, radio appearances (I heard you, and about you, on Invisible Ink), and a well-attended party about being alone know about solitude? Honestly, I want to know. I don’t mean to come off as an asshole. I suppose it’s just weird to me, as someone who’s never been invited to a party or been to a dance, to read about self-identified “quirkyalones” going to a party to meet other “quirkyalones.” Really, are you genuinely alone, or is this a way to get your name out there?

Since Sasha is busy clearing out her social calendar for media appearances, I thought I’d try to tackle this question (or, more likely, open it up for debate.) Judging whether or not someone is QA based on whether they are not “genuinely alone” misses the point. For starters, how would you measure it? The time people spend alone is often hidden, snatched on walks home or workday lunches. Even the most intensely social creatures could have islands of time spent solo that most people don’t know about. So don’t ass-u-me; you don’t need me to tell you what assuming does.

One of the biggest things that separates QAs from PTs (perky-togethers) is a belief that friendship is a central relationship, not a place-holder for romantic love. QAs are often marked by their intense commitment to privileging friendship, to making sure that they make room for their friends even when other parts of their life intrude. Solitude for QAs often has to be wrestled from the demands of work, hobbies, roommates, friends and all kinds of time-sucking social obligations. You can be a loner, someone who rarely goes to dances or parties, and be squarely in the QA camp but does not make you more of a QA than someone with an overloaded calendar. It just means you have no excuse for not attending (or throwing) an IQD party.